This post comes to you as part confession. I am a whining, moaning, angry bitch. Everything that comes out of my mouth is either a moan, a complaint, a rant or a criticism.
OK I may be exaggerating slightly for effect, but I have becoming frighteningly aware recently that I have become more critical and impatient with my speech and it is a trend I don’t like and intend to do something about.
I have spoken a lot about how “manners maketh the idler” and having good manners is an essential trait of the tortoise mind. It makes you act more mindfully and more compassionately.
However, you can be as polite as you like but if you are still moaning and whining then it makes no difference at all. You need to practice Slow Speech (which isn’t just talking slowly…).
The Buddhists call it Right Speech. It is part of the Noble Eightfold Path and described In the Pali Cannon as “…and what is right speech? Abstaining from lying, from divisive speech, from abusive speech, and from idle chatter [gossip?]: This is called right speech…”.
As you become more mindful and aware of the interconnectivity of things you will find yourself more compassionate and that will come through it what you say. Also by practising Right Speech; being mindful of your words and how you talk and what you say, you will become more mindful and compassionate (to read more about the Buddhist, read my article in the latest New Escapologist).
Or as your grandma used to say “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say it at all”…